Philosophical Breakfast

You ever get those days where your brain just won’t turn off, no matter how hard you try or how much you need it to (for, say, work related reasons)? I get that way sometimes, and every little thing I come across in my daily routine sends me off into a wistful, vaguely philosophical series of questions and comparisons, my feeble mind trying desperately to understand the concepts of the world around me. Today was one of those days.

It started like any other day. I got up this morning, and poured myself a big bowl of Life cereal. And that's when I started thinking. Eventually, I came to the conclusion that Life cereal is like Life life. You see, it starts off easy and simple enough. Early life feels like it is made up of a series of meaningful, important events which are like pieces of sweet, sugared grain, floating among the less important rest of life, the soft, creamy milk. It’s brand new and doesn't know anything of the world to come. It doesn't understand anything other than just to sit there and float on with ease. If you’re born into luckiness, then things starts off with cinnamon or marshmallows, but most of the time, it's ordinary sugar Life cereal, no different from anything else. Then things start changing. One becomes aware of its own existence, and begins to realize what its place is in the universe, what it does in life, or milk. It starts getting to work. At first it’s hard and crunchy, and can hurt if you handle it wrong, but then it starts to mellow down, and slowly become increasingly softer and easier with time and experience. This is about the point where everyone really likes Life. Things are simple, smooth, easy; you know what you're supposed to do, and you can do it without any problem. You’re used to it by now.

It seems so nice; but it won't last forever...

But then you start wanting more. At first you want just a little variety, like maybe a chocolate chip or something; but even if you have that already, it just feels like the same old stuff. Then you begin to get sick of dredging through the same old mush of Life, and you want something completely different. You're threatening to throw away the whole box and go out to get some Kix, but you realize that even if you do, the excitement of the Kix Berries is just an illusion. There are no more adventure in Kix Berries then there is in Life, there's just more sugar that gives you a rush of excitement right off the bat, and then suddenly fades away, leaving you down in the dumps after your sugar rush. Yet, you still don’t want to return to normal Life. Maybe you turn to augmenting your Life, like adding sugar, or cinnamon on your own. You try to make it better with new ingredients, or by having your Life with a bagel or something on the side. Or maybe you become superstitious. You turn to trusting your fate in Lucky Charms, or put your Life in the hands of powerful figures like Count Chocula. Some even try to force a form of structure on their lives by joining Captain Crunch’s navy. If you're not too careful, you hit a midlife crisis and suddenly find yourself chasing the white rabbit down the hole to a Trix Wonderland. But eventually, no matter what course you choose, you'll find yourself right back where you started, on the same road you've always been on, the endless road of Life. Some of the insanity is still hanging over you from the crisis. At this point you can either choose to accept your life and go on, no matter how mushy it is, no matter how soggy the milk has made it. Or you can go off the deep end and throw it all away down the sink, milk, flakes, mush, whatever your Life is at this point. Just wash it away, hit the garbage disposal, and end it all. It's a crossroads; it's a difficult choice.

This is where I sit. My Life is mushy, soggy, and downright disgusting. I don’t like Life, I hate Life. I don’t want this Life anymore. I want to escape this Life. I never want to taste my Life again. But I'm not ready to take that final step, that leap, to plunge to the depths of the sink and dash away all that's left of my Life. I'm stuck here, sinking into the abyss of the oozing Life, everything in it the same, indiscernible to tell the difference between what is solid Life and what is mere milk. What will you do? Continue eating, or just give up and throw it away? Your very Life depends on it. As for me, I think I have an idea. I'm not going to settle for this Life. I'm going to make something more of my Life, I'm going to change. I'm going to make oatmeal. What will you make out of your Life?

Well that’s all I got for now. Join me next week, friends, when I compare Ramen Noodles to divorce...